What's your "worth it"?
From the Sunday Self-Care Chronicles | 9/20/26
Hey there, friend.
I spent a chunk of this weekend texting back and forth with a friend about a question that keeps showing up in my world lately: what's “it” worth to me?
In business, it sounds like this: before you run an offer, you have to decide what it's worth to YOU to do it. Not what it costs on the back end. Not what you think people will pay for it. You have to decide what it's worth to you - your time, your energy, a piece of your one wild and precious life - in order to show up for that offer.
I just did this with my “Ask Amy” consultations. Truth? I don't book many of them, and I came this close to pulling the service altogether. But before I did, I made myself run the worth-it exercise. And because “Ask Amy” is an offer I actually love - one person, one session, their real questions - I kept it. I just reshaped it until it's genuinely worth it for me to do. Now when someone books, I can show up with a full cup instead of a scraped-empty one.
And if you've ever booked one - or ever will - hear this: you were never the question. You were always worth it. This was about whether I could keep showing up for this particular moment as my best self, sustainably, for years. That's the part that has to be worth it.
My friend is doing the same math with her business. She's about to host a big in-person event, and even after raising the price to attend, everything else got more expensive too. Right now she's not breaking even. If something doesn't change she could take a loss. And this isn't some small undertaking - it's vendors, food, activities, and the scramble when someone backs out and you have to fill their spot.
The question she's sitting with isn't “what will cover my costs” or "what will people pay to attend?" It's "what is it worth to me to pull this whole enormous thing together?"
Those are very different numbers and could be the deciding factor of if this is a one-and-done or an annual extravaganza.
But here's the thing - this question is not actually about business. It's everywhere.
It's the champagne tray getting passed around at a wedding when you've been cutting back on alcohol. Worth it?Maybe. Maybe not.
It's the candlesticks on Facebook Marketplace that, by the time I could get there today, would've added an hour to my errands. Not worth it this time. (She's holding them for me, which is its own kind of worth it!)
And it's me, at 8pm tonight, choosing to deep clean my kitchen before writing this email. Worth the later bed time? Absolutely. If you have never used GooGone Degreaser spray, I need you to know it is the most satisfying substance on earth.
And what about in breast cancer land?
This question is running constantly, quietly, in the background of a hundred decisions and nobody hands you a rubric for it.
For me: it has never been worth it to have any revisions on my reconstructed breasts.
They're not perfect – sure they've dropped some and there's a bit of rippling at times – but I can look in the mirror and smile at what I see. Maybe you'd look at them and think, if it was you, you'd already have the plastic surgery consult scheduled. That's fine. Your math isn't mine.
But I do believe that if I ever develop lymphedema in my arm, a lymphovenous bypass would likely be one of the first calls I make. Because the outcomes I've seen in my own treatment room are that impressive. One surgery, not worth it to me. A different surgery, absolutely could be.
And I watch this play out with clients all the time.
Some go through multiple surgeries chasing the size, shape, and symmetry they want. Others are content to live in what they have.
Some will do ALL the things to manage lymphedema symptoms that are, comparatively, mild. Others live with more advanced symptoms because compression sleeves, pumps, and surgeries just aren't worth it to them – and that is not giving up. That is a decision.
Here's what I know for sure: there is no universal answer. Every survivor you meet is carrying a worth-it list you can't see.
Yours is built from your body, your life, your energy, not from a formula. Which is why no two of them look alike.
And that's not a problem to fix. That's the whole point.
The trouble is when we never actually decide.
When the answer gets made by default, or by guilt, or by some invisible "should" we inherited from a pamphlet or an Instagram post. That's passive. And you know by now how I feel about passive.
Passive recovery happens by default. Active healing happens by decision.
Active healing is looking at your one body, your one life, your actual time and energy levels, and choosing what gets your “yes.”
So here's my question for you this week: what's on your worth-it list right now? And just as importantly - what have you decided (or want to decide) isn't anymore?
Hit reply and tell me. I'm collecting these.
P.S. Those Ask Amy sessions I almost pulled? They're staying. One simple choice, 45 minutes, all yours - scar tissue, lymphedema, "is this normal?", bring the whole list. Details and booking here.